Internet Dating Online: 3 Ways to Make Sure You Play It Safe
According to recent numbers, 40 million Americans have jumped into the online dating pool. The amount of usage and particular dating agencies varies per individual of course but even with taking these things into account, online dating is becoming more comfortable and accessible to the general population. For instance, Online Dating Magazine estimates there are over 120,000 marriages per year that are a direct result of internet dating. These numbers are only going to grow as the online dating becomes more interactive
Unfortunately there is a flip side. Many of us have heard or seen the stories about online hookups that have gone tragically wrong. While these incidents remain in the definite minority, they do exist.
Many free online Dating Services have yet to implement a screening process. The result is you really do not have any guarantees about the other person you are trying to meet. But let us face it; even if they prescreen applicants thoroughly, people have been known to lie. This means the responsibility of online dating safety falls squarely on to your shoulders. Use the following tips as guidelines and then later on add more of your own.
1. Good Judgment
None of us is perfect so you can never be right one hundred percent of the time but trusting someone online that you just met with the most intimate details of your life is not a good idea. In fact, it is downright dangerous. Trust has to be earned offline so the same should go double on the internet. If you sense the person on the other end is lying, then there is a strong likelihood they probably are.
It is not only the lack of telling the truth that should set off bells and whistles. Maybe they seem a little too aggressive in their answers or way too anxious to meet you immediately. Whatever the case, keep your thinking logical and your common sense on high alert.
2. Go Slow on Sharing Personal Information
You have probably seen those online dating profiles where the person volunteers every bit of their personal information including the exact hour they were born. Eventually you are going to share things like your phone number and home address but do not rush it. Also make sure your signature file is turned off or at the very least, it does not have any identifying information. Do a little bit more chatting and investigating.
3. One Phone Call Away
Okay so you both agree that it is time to hear each other’s voices. Now you are still in the investigation phase so do yourself a favor and call from a public phone (no need to give your cell phone or home number just yet). You should be able to get a better feel for the other person by having a phone conversation. Do you sense something in their tone or words that make you uneasy? Are the answers a little too perfect for your taste (i.e. telling you what they think you want to hear?). After you hang up do some serious analyzing. If you have to talk it over with someone close to you, than by all means do so.
Online Dating is the new wave and it can be a lot of fun but to get the most out of it, you must include safety as one of your top priorities. There are other steps that you should follow but start by going slow with sharing your personal information, the phone conversation and above all exercise good judgment. Keep in mind that it is better to be unhurried and overly cautious, than to let your emotions rush you into a bad situation.
Daryl Campbell
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/internet-dating-online-3-ways-to-make-sure-you-play-it-safe-257071.html
Filed under: Online Dating
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Am I a bad guy??????
I’ve been wondering this for a while because at times I feel like I’m just like every other guy while at times I feel like I’m better or worse than most other guys. Like unlike other guys who tend to live in the moment I like to try to plan for the future too. I’ve always wanted a really serious relationship but at the same time I’m very picky about who I would date. I think true love in a serious relationship is an awesome thing that I’ve wanted for like ever but at the same time I have to admit I do have daydreams about what it must be like to just have casual noncommitted sex with a really random hot girl. At times I think about how in the future I really want my own happy family because I’m afraid of ending up being a single, depressed alcoholic or something who has no family and no relatives because all I wanted to do was have sex with random women while everyone around me finally found the right person and got married and had kids. Like sometimes I’ll see a happy young couple walking down the street and I’ll really want what they have and I’ll wish that some little smiling girl was my daughter lol. Is that weird?? I wanna be a great father and a great family kinda guy which most guys my age dont think about but at the same time Im nervous about the future. Like first of all, my parents were strict so Ive never had much freedom, plus we were kinda poor so not much money either but now im 18 and so in some ways i just wanna go wild and party rather than get settled down yet deep inside I know that I cant do that forever and I prob wont be able do that for as long as most guys because thats just not me, im more serious. Also I sorta wanna be a young father like Id love to be like 45 when one of my kids is 15 rather than being like 57 so that means Ill have to get settled down earlier which part of me doesnt want but a big part of me does..So basically, who am i? Like one the one hand i really really do want a serious relationship, love, happiness, success, yet on the other hand like many guys I just wanna go wild and party and not be committed to anything. So am I like the average douchy guy that just takes advantage of every girl I meet or am I someone more mature that seems like the kinda guy that a girl can trust? I just want a bunch of girls opinions.
Also, while I said I’ve daydreamed about noncommitted casual sex to be honest I have to say that if that kinda situation did occur I really dont know whether I would go through with it because while im not very religious i guess i have been taught that thats just pretty wrong and also because I would know that by doing that both of us would be going against the values we were taught and we would prob regret it and when we get settled down with the ppl we love and have kids wed feel really hypocritical telling our kids not to do what we did and just pretending that nothing like that ever happened.
Also, Im afraid id be a bad father because on the one hand i had strict parents so i personally hate rules generally and think that ppl should have a lotta freedom, esp. kids. Like being able to have full access to the internet with no restrictions like those stupid blocking things that block content thats violent or w/e and i think ppl that are like 12 are definitely mature enough to have facebook as long as their parents tell them about how to be safe online. so i think id be a really laid back dad which is good because my kids would like me but on the other hand you shouldnt try to make ur kids like u as a friend since ur job as a parent is to care for them and make sure their safe and have a future. on the other hand i have to say some parents are too lenient, like i cant understand why some ppl let 12 year olds go to bed at 2 am even in the summer or play hardcore violent videogames like Grand Theft Auto where its totally fine to murder innocent civilians. When i was a kid i went to bed at like 9 or 10 mostly. then later at around 11 or 12. now i go to bed at like 2 and i honestly hate it and wish i could fall asleep earlier because im tired all the time.
sorry for the typos in this. so what do u think? am i just the average douche? or am a good guy? do u think i would make a good parent? thanks! and i know this is in the womens health section but i just figured that that way i would get the most girls to answer because im not really looking for responses from guys.
I think you sound like a pretty good guy. =]
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Total douche
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Not the best not the worst
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Well now. That’s alot from an 18 y/o. It’s great that you have thought about these things, and you do show some maturity in your thoughts there, especially about the relationship issue, but I again mention you are 18. You are putting the cart before the horse. I understand how it is when you reach the age and feel you are an adult and can finally do what you want and you are really eager to start your life, but now is not the time to be screwing it up. You are just getting started! You don’t want to roar out of the gate and fall flat on your face. Be patient.
The first thing you have to do is to make sure you can "support" these things you want in your life. Education & a job. At 18 how would you do that? McDonald’s? Trust me, no female want’s that for very long, and neither do you. That Dad you describe doesn’t want that for his kids either. Decide what you want to do with the rest of your life education & career wise and work on that for the next few years. Do not let anything stop you from getting that. You will meet girls during this process. Dating is all about find the right one to spend your life with. Who says you have to have meaningless sex? That is for each party to decide. Pay no attention to what all those others around you are saying and doing. They won’t be there for long and trust me, it will be interesting to see where they are years from now. You are the only one responsible for the life you lead. You will make mistakes as I assume you are only human and we all do. But learn from those mistakes and they will make you better. That is not just a saying….it really is true. At 18 you can not possibly understand everything I am telling you, but you will in a few years. From what you have said about the way you were raised, this is basically the way you will live you life. In general we all do one of 2 things. We either basically follow how we were raised or we totally rebel against it. You don’t sound like the rebellious kind right now, and hopefully that won’t change. Yes you sound like a good guy and you will make a good father, altho the parental control issues you probably will rethink and change when you have your first child. You will become very protective and understand such things at that time little one. Wanting to be a friend is great, but you have to be a parent first. You can be their friend when they get older.
For now…..school and enjoy being young. You have time. Good luck.
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Retired RN & Grandma