Archive for August, 2010

 

Think about the difference between doing something because it’s important vs. doing something in order to learn.

 

So, for instance, if I saw a woman that I wanted to meet… instead of thinking, “OK, I have to say something charming and original so she’ll like me… and if I screw up I’m going to be embarrassed” – I began to think things like, “I’m going to learn how to get a woman’s phone number within a few minutes of meeting her… and part of learning this is going to be trying a lot of different things that probably aren’t going to work… but in the end, it’s all going to even out because I’m going to have the SKILL that I want.”

 

See the difference?

 

Well, let me tell you, that change in attitude made a huge impact on my success. I was willing to do and try things that I never would have tried in the past for fear of screwing up…

 

All because I had the attitude of “I’m going to learn something from this and improve my skills… and it doesn’t matter what happens in this particular situation”, I was able to improve very rapidly.

 

And the more I began to apply this idea, the more success I had in all areas with women… from the first meeting, to getting them to go out with me, to taking things to a physical level.

 

 

So do this:

 

Go out right now and start a conversation with a woman.

 

I don’t care if she’s attractive or not.

 

But instead of having the objective of getting a date, have the objective of learning something.

 

In fact, if you really want to improve fast, go spend a day starting conversations with women, but make the commitment to NOT get any phone numbers or dates all day.

 

In other words, no matter what happens, you can’t date any of the women that you meet that day.

 

See if you can just learn how to do a few simple things like say, “Hi” to every woman that walks by… how to maintain eye contact with women until they look away… and how to end a conversation “too soon” so she feels a natural vacuum and tries to keep it going herself…

 

That’s one good idea for dealing with your fears

David_DeAngelo
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/how-to-quotcurequot-your-fear-of-women-and-dating-part-3-499310.html

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Retro Shapewear – a Fashion Revival

Retro styling – these days the term is being applied to everything from clothing to furnishing the home. The name retro comes from the Latin meaning ‘backwards’. This article is concerned with retro lingerie, or to be more specific retro shapewear.

Although most of the comments that follow describe the sleek chic girdles from the fifties and sixties, they can equally apply to today’s girdles that are based on the original designs.

The war years were years of austerity and women on both sides of the channel dressed for comfort, to help the war effort. Women, eager to attract partners at the end of the war, so fashions reflected this desire. Couture house Christian Dior came up with styling needing a sleek, chic silhouettes. Now girdles, corsets or corselets became essential. Suddenly all women wore girdles, and not just women either – all the shapewear manufacturers targeted not just women but teens as well. A variety of girdles for the young adult were produced. Probably the teen girdle that gained the maximum coverage, in more than one sense, was the panty girdle – a tight-fitting cross between a girdle that held the tummy in and one that protected the wearer from advances, whether unwelcome of otherwise!

The girdle had several functions – to give that sleek chic silhouette to the wearer and to hold up the nylon stockings. Girdles generally had a minimum of two pairs of garter clips. There are two at the front and two garter clips, usually slightly offset from the rear. The garters are offset so that when the girdle wearer sits down they do not have to sit directly on the clips! The open bottom girdles usually have the garter clips on elastic straps, which is useful in keeping the nylon stockings taught as the wearer moves about, sitting and standing. The nylon stockings from the fifties did not have spandex or lycra and were non-stretch; without the elastic of the garter strap the stocking would ‘bag’ as the wearer stood up.

The panty girdle, and particularly the long-leg panty girdle often has the garter tab attached directly to the girdle itself. The long-leg panty girdle legs usually completely overlap and cover the stocking-welt, losing the gap of bare thigh above the stocking top. Men usually find the flash of bare thigh and garter strap exciting; however, a long leg panty girdle, although practical, hides all this and has consequently been described (along with pantyhose) as a “passion killer”.

Girdle materials Modern and retro girdles usually feature spandex or Lycra for elasticity, but the original girdles dating from around the 1930s usually used rubber to give stretch. The introduction of rubber was a major step in corsetry – the ultra-rigid corset had suddenly become more flexible. In parallel with its introduction the terms associated with such items of clothing also metamorphosed: from the original corset, the term roll-on came into vogue, particularly in the USA, then came the step-in and the corselette, often known as the ‘all in one’.

Indeed for a while Playtex marketed a girdle molded from pure latex – these have become quite the collectors item these days, partly because of rarity value. Pure latex deteriorates over time and the garment then perishes, so few remain in good condition. It is interesting to know whether the common latex allergy affected wearers, but whatever the reason, these girdles are no longer manufactured by Playtex.

Retro shapewear share the same objective as vintage shapewear did, namely to sculpt the shape of the body. Elasticity can help to hold and control figures but for more rigid control a variety of ‘bones’ have been used over the years. The original whalebone corset did actually use whale baleen – which are the cartilage-like “teeth” which whales use to filter plankton. Each baleen is enormous, around ten inches wide and ten to twelve feet long. It proved an ideal material for corset makers because it consisted of parallel fibres that could be relatively easily split into thin strips; these strips could be shaped by heating them over steam and when they cooled they held their shape. Of course the demise of the whale population led to the supply becoming an issue. Fortunately other alternatives proved suitable – manmade plastics like celluloid, and even flattened steel springs!

Historic background to the corset The forerunner of the girdle was the corset, and that had its origins further back still in ladies stays. Indeed there is archaelogical evidence going back to 3000BC showing women with waists cinched in tightly by a garment that appears ribbed. It was around the fourteenth century that women started wearing a stiffened linen undergarment garment, laced in at the front or back, and by the fifteenth century these ‘stays’ were relatively common; the probable derivation of the English corset from bodice (‘bodies’) to the French translation of this ‘corps’ which transmuted back to corset. The original corsets were made by stitching together two layers of linen with a paste in the middle of the ‘sandwich’ to provide stiffening. By the 16th century corset makers had turned to using whalebone (actually more correctly called baleen) to offer the stiffening. This provided more rigidity than the earlier paste corsets.

By 1940, in both America and Europe, the corset had given way to the girdle, worn in conjunction with a bra.

After the fifties came the swinging sixties, when women were exhorted to burn their bras and stop wearing such restrictive underwear. But as with all fashion, girdle wearing has now gone full circle. Burlesque artists have made the ‘art of tease’ in which girdles, basques and corsets are on show, into popular entertainment. Wonderbra have enticed the burlesque star Dita von Teese to design, model and market a range of retro girdles and bras based on fifties designs.

The burlesque art form is now burgeoning and the esteemed Royal Festival Hall held the worlds largest burlesque lesson in January 2009, evidencing how mainstream this art has become. Original fifties girdles, corsets and basques are found in specialist online lingerie boutiques or vintage stores, but to satisfy the demand all sorts of outlets have now sprung up to satisfy the demands of burlesque. These shops and online stores invariably turn to the forties and fifties for styling inspiration for their retro shapewear – and the biggest item that seems to be in demand is the corset. Fashion really has returned to its roots.

Debbie Mendoza
http://www.articlesbase.com/home-and-family-articles/retro-shapewear-a-fashion-revival-720214.html

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Every day millions of under-sexed guys across the globe ask themselves, “Where can I meet women?” Hey, there’s nothing wrong with that! The sex drive in the human mammal is one of the primary motivators for all actions and thought processes. That’s what Freud believed and Freud was a bit of a player himself, having a wife, a lust with his sister-in-law and even a fixation on his mother. (Yikes!) Psychology aside, the moment you start to make peace with yourself over your natural desires for intimacy and companionship, the more successful in dating you will become.

This lesson is usually taught to males, and a certain population among men who lack sexual confidence. It’s a bit of a stereotype to suggest that good boys turn into nice guys and then eventually finish last when it comes to dating. This is not necessarily true, even if this does seem to be the proverbial case. A more accurate statement would be that sexually inexperienced men seem to have trouble meeting new singles. This may be because they are young, and they are relatively new to dating lifestyle, or have just recently ended long-term relationship. Because they lack experience, they may perceive dating and the Big Question as a stressful situation. Nobody likes rejection, after all, and the dating world can seem ruthless in terms of how people treat one another’s feelings, respect and dignity.

The same principles taught to men also apply to females. Women are taught by society to be “ladylike” and to refrain from expressing overt interest in a member of the opposite sex. While some feminists and very sexy uninhibited women challenge this notion every day, for a certain population of women, they are also unsuccessful in looking for romance. They might ask themselves the same question: where can I meet singles and why does it have to be so complicated?

Let’s start by addressing the fundamental issue: there is no right or wrong place to meet singles. Single men and women are everywhere. What happens is that we deceive ourselves into thinking that circumstances have to be near-perfect in order for the dating ritual to start. Not true—you can meet anybody in any given social situation, from something as mundane to shopping at a grocery store or as spectacular as blasting off to the moon. The first step in transforming your dating life is to realize that there is an entire world of possibilities out there.

The real question is not, “Where can I meet singles?” but what is stopping you from swallowing your pride and showing an interest in someone you like, no matter where you meet them? Meeting singles is not as hard as you think. It can be as easy as going to a singles bar or chatting up an attractive person at the bank. The biggest problem is that we want the dating scene to be set up “just so”, so we can feel comfortable and be able to handle a conversation.

The real answer then is to work on improving your communication skills and on readjusting your attitude towards dating. Don’t be afraid of rejection. The statistics show us that many types of people are completely incompatible with each other. Whether you realize this after three years of marriage, or a 30 second conversation at a bus stop, is irrelevant. It’s not “rejection” to you personally. It’s just the word “no”. Stop reliving your childhood days and developing such a complex to a simple word! Realize that the cookie jar you want in life is yours for the taking! It may take persistence and some preparation, but it’s never as hard as you think it is. The worrying stage is the worst part of it all, so let’s get together and have some cookies!

Richard Adams
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/why-meeting-singles-isnt-as-hard-as-you-may-think-675729.html

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Online dating has become very popular and with so many members now interested in such sites the social interaction on the Internet is has grown by an impressive amount. Things such as chat rooms, voice chats, profiles and video conferencing are just a few of the features that have made it so attractable to people.

If you have ever had the experience of online then you will know that it can at times be boring and bland. If the features within dating sites are not used you find yourself just searching for a date and no more. On-line dating sites have took this into consideration and have added a whole host of features to their service. Now there are online dating sims or online dating simulators that have been implemented for their members.

The on-line dating simulators that are available today will allow you to create your own character and date so you can simulate dating with a degree of realism. You can now walk around a virtual city while searching for a date. The birth of these games were from multi player online role playing games where you could play with people from all round the world or just with your friends online.

With Online Dating sims instead of fighting monsters you can now walk around and online town that will allow you to chat with other characters that are there. There is also the option to purchase accessories with “virtual money” that will help in making your character look more hip and trendy.

Such on-line dating simulators have become very popular amongst teen who enjoy being able to socialize with people from all over the world. Depending on the server you have access to you can either play with players in your own country or worldwide.

These online dating games add an extra dimension that means you no longer need to visit a chat room to speak to people but instead you can interact virtually with people. This is growing more popular each day. You are in full control of your character, choose to take a stroll through the city, get a job and also sleep to regain any energy lost. It gives you the ability to ask someone on a date, meet new friends without having to leave the comfort of your own home.

There are also on-line dating simulation games that can be played in single player mode. In these kinds of on-line dating sim game, you will be dating virtual characters with random personalities and moods. It can be quite a challenge and you really have to be like a real “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” to be able to impress the virtual character.

You also have a lot of things to do like working out to have a more appealing body, finding a job to get money for your dates or buying simulated character gifts. Much like the real world, online dating sim game can really be a challenge when it comes to wooing someone to like you.

With the ability to play against real people always takes preference. That is the main reasons why games such as MMORPG is rising in popularity in relations to online dating simulator games. There are a wide range of sim games to choose from that will either allow you to play for free or pay a membership cost.

The games themselves have tasks which your character must undertake in order to get access to items that will improve your characters appearance. An example of this would be clothes, sunglasses and other similar items.

In some on-line games, you have to pay through prepaid cards where you have to buy them from authorized dealers and top up your characters account. Usually, these kinds of games have a trial period so you can get a feel for the game before you actually pay for it.

Such games will also have a server for themselves where you’ll have to register your characters in order to play with other people on that server.

So, if you want more realism in on-line dating, you should try a online dating sims game. It is a much better and much more fun way to meet people, date them, make friends or start romantic relationships.

There are even times that some of the lucky people in these kinds of games have found that special someone and ended up having a meaningful and romantic relationship.

Just like on-line dating normally you should always get to know a person well before considering going on a date with them for real. This will help you to find out more about the person and to see what he or she looks like. You are able to exchange pictures using email or can even use video chat with instant messenger.

Don’t get stuck in those plain old boring dating websites, try a new kind of dating with online dating simulators.

Holly Stevens
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/online-dating-sims-games-bringing-realism-to-dating-72433.html

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I made the decision a few years ago that I needed to get the area of my life ‘handled’ called ‘dealing with women’. So I made a decision and a commitment to myself and my best friend that I would do whatever it took to learn and ‘figure this out’. (Read Chapter 1 from Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill for more on this mindset.)

Some background: The girlfriends that I had in the past were mostly from luck now that I reflect on it. They were there, and I felt lucky to have them as my girlfriend at the time.

But I never knew how to approach women I didn’t know, and I could sit in a bar for three hours making eye contact with a woman and never have the nerve to go talk to her. Right now I’m just turning 30, and I’m about 5’10” and 160 pounds. I think I’m reasonably good looking, but I’ve never been the kind of guy that women just walk up and approach. (I say this to give you a frame of reference in relationship to the comments I make relating to looks, etc.) I’ve made myself more attractive by paying attention, learning, and using what works.

When I made the decision to get this part of my life handled, I decided that instead of trying to start with an angle (working at a strip club, becoming famous for something, etc.) that I would like to learn in a way that gave me power to act with just my personality and presentation. In other words, I wanted to make this part of who I was rather than a ‘trick’.

I have a rule of thumb in life that I use… it takes about 2-4 years just to get ‘good’ at something. And I mean JUST TO GET GOOD. Think martial arts, playing an instrument… anything. (Read Chapter 1 of Mastery by Leonard for more wisdom on
this topic.)

Sure, you can have some success and fun while learning, but experience has shown me that to really ‘get’ something and to be able to use it in many contexts successfully, you need to apply yourself for 2-4 years.

THEN, I think it takes another 2-4 years to become a ‘master’ of whatever you’re doing.

At the 10+ year level is usually where the Genius level really kicks in…
My point here is to say that I’ve been applying myself for a few years now, and I am now at the point where I feel confident and in control around women. I encourage you to make this a long-term commitment rather than just trying to get an instant cure. It will be worth it in the long run.

If you’re just plain lazy and want a shortcut, go ahead and try all of them. But you’ll most likely find, like most others do, that massive success with this material takes practice, effort, and a commitment.

David_DeAngelo
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/david-deangelos-dating-story-of-dealing-with-women-438777.html

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